13 June 2011

An amateur analysis of Rep. Weiner

The more I learn about this whole debacle, the more I pity Anthony Weiner.  Because I know how it feels.

Growing up, I was a goofy-looking, slender kid with minimal social skills, no interest in sports, and a name that guaranteed loads of laughter from my peers.  I ended up broken, rageful and determined to prove myself to...who?  Anyone.  Everyone.  Me.  You.  Whoever.  So I drank, smoked, did drugs, gave the bird to polite society, and became such a slut they wouldn't let me visit the Virgin Islands.  Eventually, through the grace of God and wonderful friends, I started dealing with my inner demons.  I won't say I'm cured, but I've come a long way.

Rep. Weiner hasn't.  He's got the Small Man Complex, just as I used to.  He ruthlessly pursues political power, hits the gym and builds himself up as much as possible, and throws himself at any woman who pays him the slightest bit of attention.  Because he's NOT that cringing, confused figure of fun who's beaten up by the boys and turned down by the girls.  He's CONGRESSMAN WEINER, DAMMIT.  He's buff, he's powerful, he's sexy, and goshdarnit, chicks dig him!

Mr. Weiner, please take a good look at yourself, your motivations, your fears, hopes and dreams.  It's not too late to become the person you ought to be.  Whatever you've done, whoever you've been--salvation is possible.  But the first step is to take an honest look at your behavior and sincerely wish to change.  Not because it's politically expedient, but because it's the right thing to do.

Trust me.  Ridding yourself of your past hurts is scary, but ultimately worth it.  I know.

1 comment:

  1. "The libs are just honked off because, after careful consultation with the finest scientific minds, they discovered that a flag placed underwater just will not burn. :(("

    Your response to West planting the flag... was PERFECT!!!!!!! Thank made my day.

    ReplyDelete

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