Double-Secret Probation!

So, it appears the Republicans have put together a little pledge, detailing all the things they intend to do when we finally flush enough Dems out of DC.  It behooves us to inquire exactly why we should believe them.  They took Congress in 1994 on the Contract With America, and fizzled out into yet another DeceptiCon mess.  In fact, both parties have had a Contract With America since 1787.  It's called the Constitution; maybe you've heard of it.  They've certainly acted like they haven't.

A nice piece of irony occurs in the foreword.  After a pretty fair analysis of our situation, it states:  "The American people do not accept these counsels of timidity, failure and despair."  Hopefully the Cocktail Party campaign teams will read this, because it hasn't seemed like they got the memo.  After reading through their Pledge, I have to admit that I like what I see.  It doesn't go nearly far enough, but it's a good start.  The question is, will they actually live up to it?  For the sake of argument, let us say that they actually intend to. 

They had damned well better.

Listen up, Cocktail Party:  The American people are done being manipulated, lied to and screwed over.  If you sign this pledge, and attain office on these issues, you will see that they happen.  We will not accept excuses.  We will not tolerate failure.  You will fight tooth and nail, to the last drop of blood in your veins and the last molecule of breath in your lungs, to make these things happen.  You have no other option.

If you arrive in Washington and start fumbling around, pointing fingers and making excuses, the Republican Party is history.  Literally.  You're going out like the Whigs.  You will never again win an election anywhere in America.  At best, a new party will emerge; perhaps the Libertarians will expand or the Tea Party will get political.  At worst, enough people will lose all faith in the political process that there will be open insurrection and/or secession.  No sane person wants bullets over ballots, but we're coming dangerously close to the point where a critical mass of people may see no other option.

This is your absolute last chance.  DO NOT jack it up.